Tuesday, March 10, 2009

(I Muffed the Poll--Re-vote Please?) Facebook 101 Needed

Hi Friends. I just jumped into the world of Facebook, but I have a lot of questions. Since I saw many of you there, maybe you can help me out.

1. What's the point of it? In my limited experience of 12 hours on, I have found 2 benefits.
First, I was able to connect with people that I haven't seen for along time--even grade school aquaintances and people I taught in the MTC. And there is something nice about being able to say, "Hey! In this big old world I still remember you and you still remember me. What's up?" But do relationships ever grow? Or is it just like signing high school yearbooks everyday?
Second, speaking of high school, it was very eye-opening to go through my high school class profiles. Wow! As far as I can tell, there are three groups: those who look like supermodels, those who look greyer/balder/chubbier, and those who chose very discreet pictures so that you can't see them clearly. After going through every picture file, it seems my supermodel ones have disappeared and the only ones I can find would put me in the greyer/balder/chubbier category. (Is it any wonder that all the ads on my facebook page are about anti-aging strategies?) So can I have your help? Here are three pictures. Will you please vote on the sidebar for which one would best represent me on my facebook profile?

Picture A (which, for those of you who asked, also shows my new haircut & Marci, I've cropped all I can):
Picture B (cropped from the first version)

Picture C


Picture D (thanks for the ideas, Jen)



2. The second question I have is about your philosophy in adding friends. Do you add every positive acquaintance? What about second cousins twice removed? Are you obligated to add family who asks to be added? Should you send a friend invite to people you had crushes on in high school, even though you are perfectly and happily married (yes, ballroom dancing is back on track)? And theoretically speaking, does it really matter if you have 100 "friends" on facebook, but you wouldn't call any of them if you were having a bad day and needed to talk?

So what is Facebook? A great social networking tool? or a newer, better, trendier way to waste time?

11 comments:

Jen I said...

Yeah, facebook is a funny place. I have people who I guess went to high school try to add me who I can't place for the life of me. Sometimes I add them, sometimes I don't. I didn't add my brother's ex-wife, although she's invited me three times. That was getting a little to far out there. Some people I just add because they invite me although I'm sure I'll never look at their profile again.

But I have re-connected with some really great people. I've started having conversations with my once best friend who is now totally far out of the church. I found another friend who I think is no longer active, and we discovered we live about 5 minutes from each other in Miami of all things. And now we've hung out and I'm going to get him to sing in church with a small group of us. So in some ways, I think that's nothing but good to keep in touch with some LDS friends for people like him.

I do add ex-boyfriends. I still have very good relationships with them - well, meaning we're happy for each other that our lives turned out well. It's been really nice to say hi to them and see what they're up to. I also love chatting with people on facebook (you can see who of your friends are online in the bottom right corner and start chatting with them - although it's sometimes awkward to end it!)

As for your photo, first of all yeah - holy haircut! That seems like a big change! Fun. But the picture is a little severe. I think the one of you and Troy is nice, but can you crop it in a little closer? The third one is pretty - but seriously, those last two pictures make people wonder if you're ugly now so you don't want to show your face! Which, you are NOT. What about the picture of your family on the right of your blog page - you could even just crop you out of that one - it's really nice. Wow. Too much discourse. SORRY! And yes, it is a trendy way to waste time as well. :)

Our Loved-up Family said...

I have a love/hate feeling about facebook. I personally don't add people who aren't personal friends. I have requests from people who I do know, but we've never had a relationship with, I don't add them either. In fact, I even deleted some because we haven't been in contact since connetcing on facebook, and I felt like I was just kind of fake friendship if we weren't going to communicate now...? I am quite security conscious, and I like how only your friends can see your profile (you can change the security settings), I personally like seeing peoples up-to-date photo's on their profile, so I'd pick number 1. I use it purely for keeping in touch and letting a group of friends at once know what I am up to, rather than having to bulk email everyone seeing as how our family blog is private.

AnnaMarie said...

Definitely a way to waste time. I don't add people as friends unless we're friends in real life. I just use it to keep up on my friends' and previous friends' lives...

Megan said...

Add everyone! The more the merrier! You know, it's totally a popularity contest to see who can get the most friends :) I don't add anyone I don't recognize, but I have added people who requested my friendship that I never really talked to much before, because well, it seemed rude not to, and what's the harm? It has been from some of these same people where they feel comfortable or secure enough now to tell you things (nice things) they thought of you then, but weren't in the same crowd, so never did. It's nice to hear. And, it's just fun to be all up in everyone's "bidness". See you Wednesday.

Marci said...

I love the first picture, but only if you crop your camera out of it. Too bad you can't see your face in the third pic, because it's a beautiful 'mother/child' moment. But the idea of putting your picture in your profile (so I figure, I haven't entered the world but Corey is knee deep and loving it) is for people to verify they are talking to the person they thought. Good luck! I hear it's pretty addicting, but not as big of a time committment as posting in your blog. It's more just snippets and conversations (more interactive than blogging, too, I guess).

John and Danielle Corrigan said...

You are so funny. More than half of our "friends" on Facebook are people we would never consider talking to on the phone. I just like knowing that all the people I used to know actually still exist. I have lived in a lot of places, and it's nice to see pictures and think of fun memories. I have added ex-boyfriends as well. My Mom totally loves Facebook. She has LOVED being able to reconnect with every friend she's ever had in elementary, middle, high, and college. And of course, Facebook is also a big waste of time. :-)

sarah said...

I agree with the suggestion of cropping your camera out of the picture or using D. Have fun facebooking!

emily j said...

I vote for the last picture....and I already told you my feelings about facebook - I really feel that the good outweighs the bad overall.

Deb said...

I vote for the last picture (actually I like them all) and I love your hair cut!
I've been on FB for about a month, so I'm not a great judge. It's fun and very addicting but once you get the people you most want to hear about, it's easy to check every couple of days. I like it because I've been able to reconnect with long lost friends - so easy to find people and almost everybody seems to be on it. I don't add all friends - only people I really want to connect with or hear about. the more friends you have, the more stuff you get that you might not want to hear. (boring stuff). sorry, no offense intended to anyone.

Deb said...

I vote for the last picture (actually I like them all) and I love your hair cut!
I've been on FB for about a month, so I'm not a great judge. It's fun and very addicting but once you get the people you most want to hear about, it's easy to check every couple of days. I like it because I've been able to reconnect with long lost friends - so easy to find people and almost everybody seems to be on it. I don't add all friends - only people I really want to connect with or hear about. the more friends you have, the more stuff you get that you might not want to hear. (boring stuff). sorry, no offense intended to anyone.

hidstro said...

I have to tell you that I LOVE facebook. It just is a super easy way to keep in contact with friend on my own time. And it also is a wonderful way to re-connect with long lost friends. For example, I just "found" my 5th gr. best friend who moved away and kind of "fell of the face of the earth". Not only have we emailed, exchanged pictures and IM-ed, but we have pans to see each other soon. Yes, we could have just exchanged phone numbers, but this is just a little less threatening...

I do add almost anyone who wants to be my "friend". I just figure I have nothing to hide. ...And I think sometimes people are just hoping to make a connection so that's why they put in the "friend" request. As for old boyfriends, ..sure, why not?